I’ve seen anger get a bad rap. It is labelled as a “negative emotion”. It is certainly uncomfortable and doesn’t make you feel good.
It isn’t inherently bad, though. It is simply information.
It is information that lets you know that something really doesn’t feel right to you. You have the option to get curious about your anger and try to figure out what message it’s sending you.
As you get curious and learn more about your anger, you can choose how to react to it.
Being conscious of and curious about your anger gives you the power of choice.
Anger, like all emotions, is simply part of who we are, so there’s nothing to be ashamed of. Quotes like “holding onto anger is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die” help to increase negative thinking and shame around anger.
If you’ve been holding onto your anger, chances are that you haven’t been able to dig deep into why it’s there.
I’ve had my own anger for a very long time. I’m working through my own stuff to get to the source of it, and it is incredibly helpful.
Acknowledge your anger. Thank it for being there and for giving you information. Get curious. See where it leads you.
On the other hand, anger held by people of color and marginalized people and communities is a completely different story that I am totally unequipped to speak on. Just know that I see you and always want to do what I can to help, whether I know how to or not.
My writing and perspective isn’t for everybody, but I never know who may be reading this, so I try to be as inclusive as possible.